Monday, February 13, 2012

What a five years!

Five years ago today, I gave birth to a child that I didn't know I wanted.

If you don't know my history, you have to understand my life at that time to fully get that statement. My oldest two are about 16 months apart in age. And just about the time that I was catching my breath from two pregnancies and babies (when #2 turned 1), God announced a third. This baby changed everything. We had to move houses and neighborhoods. This baby set an already weary body into over-drive. During the time of this pregnancy, my husband was in the middle of an intense Master's program that was coupled with an already intense job. We had made our plans about the future of our family and this baby wasn't in it.

Three babies in three years. I had enough of the "you do know what causes this, don't you?" comments. I was bone weary, soul-tired, emotionally tapped out.

And then I met her. I never knew just how she would change my whole life.

The happy baby who could go from laughing to sleeping within a nano-second. The baby with the spiky dark hair that wouldn't lay down until the day of her baptism. The little girl who while learning to walk wore squeaky shoes (so that way I could know where she was).

Olivia Grace, you are an unbelievable child. Sometimes I have felt a little crazed in trying to parent you. You are curious, independent, confident, fearless, creative, content, thoughtful, and kind to others.

You are a gift that I did not deserve. I am thrilled that you are my daughter.

 I pray that I am a mother that gives you wings to fly, allows you to express your deep heart, encourages you to run to the arms of your Savior, teaches you to love & to fully live in the world, helps you to see the beauty in the people and nature that are all around us.

Has it already been five years? Already you seem so big, so ready to take on the world, to conquer it with your love and imagination (and a little bit of sass). Already you don't need me all the time.

I pray that you become a woman of God, that in every action people know and see the feet and hands and face of Christ. I pray that you have a heart of compassion, lips of prayer and praise, hands of service, and feet that feel free enough to dance and move as the Lord calls.

I am so thankful for you. You are absolutely one of God's immeasurable gifts.

Happy Birthday, Olivia!