In the past few weeks, my sense of contentment in mothering has increased ten-fold and there have been some moments that make thankful, happy, and at-peace with the reality that I am a stay at home mom. Lest you think all is roses, I am learning that sometimes roses are hidden underneath the laundry and a pile of dirty diapers, covered in a layer of dust or sometimes packed away in the attic where I have to look really really hard to find it, but it is always there.
One example, the time change sucks! Obviously the people who feel the time change is necessary do not have children at home, becuase every time we adjust our clocks an hour, my kids are screwed up for at least a week. This time change is no exception. The other night K and OG were up for at least an hour in the middle of the night. At one point the giggling sisters decided that it was no longer time to hang out in bed and went downstairs and turned on all the lights (I presume that had I not caught them and sent them back to bed they would have each gotten their own breakfast at 3 a.m.) Last night, It was just K--who I had the opportunity to snuggle close to in bed for 2hours before she finally fell asleep. (See, I found the rose, it was covered by a layer of exhaustion)
But other things, they are learning the value of quiet time, J is reading more and more and learning how to spell and write. He proudly tells me that he knows how to write "fox" I assume that it is becuase it is Eric's favorite animal--No mommy, he informs me, its becuase that's the channel NASCAR is on. Ah ha. K is starting to write her letters, but more importantly is confident enough to break out into dance whenever there is music playing--and she often asks for dancing music. At night, J & K cuddle up to me and we read a chapter or two of Charlotte's Web together. OG is learning how to be a part of this family and really has thrown some of the most fantastic temper tantrums in the past few days. Really, I still haven't figured out why.
It's remembering these things in the midst of all the other things that I can't get done, the things I want to do but don't have the energy for, or even the things that completely pass my by, these are the things that keep me going as a mommy. And yes, I do love my job.